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04/14/2005

Bishop Jackson to NYC Politicians: Agree with me or else

by Jeremy Hooper

bishjacksonFollowing a summit on gay marriage and "moral values" held yesterday at NYC's The King's College, Christian leaders from across the nation held themselves a lil' press conference. At said conference, Bishop Harry Jackson (pic.) seized the opportunity to warn NYC's elected officials: Be of progressive mind and liberal viewpoint, and your ass will be waiting tables at Red Lobster faster than you can say 'religious dogma.'

Okay, so he didn't say exactly that. But what he did say wasn't too far off:

"We came together in New York City to send a strong message to elected officials and candidates for public office in New York and across America: vote against gay marriage, abortion and for other moral value issues, or evangelical Christians throughout the U.S. will continue to vote you out of office. NYC Mayor Michael Bloomberg, NYC Council Speaker Gifford Miller, Fernando Ferrer, Manhattan Borough President C. Virginia Fields, Congressman Anthony Weiner, NYS Comptroller Alan Hevesi and NYS Attorney General Elliott Spitzer, that means you too."

It's unclear as to how evangelicals "throughout the U.S." will vote NYC officials out of office, but never underestimate these kids. For all we know, they could be cooking up federal legislation that allows evangelicals to cast multiple votes in multiples districts, seeing as how they're the only ones who can be trusted to steer the ship that is America. After all, us Manhattanites surely can't be in control of our own lives.


::This NYC writer rolls eyes so liberally, he fears Bishop Jackson will send him back to Tennessee::

So what other NYC-centric things will Jackson work on once he successfully removes all liberals from office? Well, rumor has it that he'll next attempt to adorn the Naked Cowboy with clothing, as well as have the Broadway musical Mamma Mia rechristened "Sodomites Sing Abba."

It's their world, we just sin in it.

Vote Against Gay Marriage and For Other Moral Values or We'll Vote You Out of Office says Local and National Christian Groups [High Impact Leadership Coaltion]

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