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12/21/2005
Proposed Mass. queer nups ban deemed kosher
The ballot initiative seeking to ban gay marriage in Massachusetts has been officially certified by Secretary of State William Galvin. The matrimony-banning measure now heads to the state legislature, where it must be approved by both the House and Senate in two successive sessions in order for the bullsh*t to be sent to the state's voters in '08.
In other certification of foulness news, the Mass. Secretary of State reportedly took a dump yesterday, looked in the toilet, and verified that it was, in fact, feces that he had dislodged. However, unlike the aforementioned legislative excrement -- which will be allowed to stick around to stink up the state -- the poo in the commode was merely flushed to its watery grave, thus ending its noxious existence. Here's hoping the Mass. legislature will follow suit by sending this nauseating marriage-barring measure to the law-making sewer, where it can swim around with similarly stench-ridden failed amendments, once shat the lawmakers' general direction by a previous generation of intolerants.
Secretary of state certifies seven initiative petitions [AP via Boston.com]
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