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04/19/2006

Student ousted b/c he didn't want Sue, won't sue

by Jeremy Hooper

Jason Johnson, the University of Cumberlands student who was recently expelled for being gay, has reportedly reached an agreement with the school that'll allow him to send in course work so that he won't receive "F's". Those grading Johnson's work will, of course, do so in full Haz-mat suits, so as to not catch any of the "gay" that may have seeped out of his pores and onto the page.

In exchange for being allowed to submit the work and "preserve [his] academic record," Johnson has agreed to relinquish his right to sue the university for damages; however, he will be able to file complaints with the U.S. Department of Education and a regional accrediting agency. We expect those complaints to sound something like, "Uhm yea, hi -- I merely went to school and didn't live a lie, and they booted me for it. Pretty f***ed up, right?"

Student won't seek damages or be stuck with F's [Lex. Herald-Leader]

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