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05/24/2006

Grab your nuptials shields, for 'Marriage Protection Sunday' is nigh

by Jeremy Hooper

Southern Baptist churches are being asked to use their Sunday June 4 services to push for a federal marriage amendment, the piece of legislative cow dung that's scheduled to be debated in the Senate that following Monday.

And seriously -- what better use could there possibly be for church time? We can think of none other than the twenty thousand and three we did think of. ::sigh::

As part of this so-called "Marriage Protection Sunday" initiative, the SBC's so-called Ethics & Liberty Commission is suggesting that:

-- Information on “same-sex marriage” could be distributed.

-- Pastors might preach on the issue.

-- Those in attendance could be encouraged to call or e-mail their senators June 5 or 6 to urge them to vote for the Marriage Protection Amendment

Relatedly, as part of our "Ugh, There You Guys Go With That Deceptive 'Protect Marriage' Talk Again" Year, we are snarkily suggesting that:

--They should just construct an actual moral pedestal, from which they can spend the service looking down their noses on anyone or anything they deem lesser than themselves

-- The congregation can think of as many ways to say "we simply don't care for gay people" as possible, without actually saying it

-- Pastors might show the "Will & Grace" finale, at which they can throw condemnations and spit wads

After all, folks -- it's our marriages and unions that are truly under attack, so we'll stop at nothing to show these kids the folly of their hurtful ways. Guess you could call it our "Self Protection Every Day."

Pro-Family Pastors Prepare Pulpits for 'Marriage Protection Sunday' [Christian Post]

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