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10/12/2006

Liberty <for conservative Evangelicals who aren't gay Sunday

by Jeremy Hooper

Does anyone remember those Laff-A-Lympics cartoons, wherein various Hanna Barbera stars would join together in one mega animated spectacular and all compete in Olympic style competition? Well if not, let us refresh your memory:

Mmm...suddenly this writer has a raging craving for Fruity Pebbles and Strawberry Quick! But after temporarily curbing my nostalgic stomach rumblings, I can't help but wonder: What if you were to imagine that same "the gang's all here" concept, but instead of the good-natured animated fun, you were to replace it with misguided, discriminatory extremists ranting on anti-gay politics? What might such a pow-wow look like? Who might be present? Just what might it be?

Well, there is of course no way to be sure, but we think it'd look something like:

Picture 8-15

Yes, my friends, the Family Research Council is throwing another one of their nationally simulcast conventions this weekend, where they say they will "respond to the growing threat" posed by "the expansion of non-discrimination laws to include homosexuality," which they claim "inevitably constricts our right to express and act on our religious beliefs." And that's their sole stated cause for this event o' "liberty" -- to stem the tide of gay non-discrimination!

::sigh:: It is good to have goals.

And of course when you've got a queer-unfriendly cause like that, it's a given that all of the "pro-family" all-stars are gonna come out for the thinly veiled game of smear the queer! Tony Perkins, Bishop Wellington Boone, Alan Chambers, Chuck Colson, Marilyn Musgrave, Gary Bauer, Mitt Romney, Don Wildmon -- all will be present and accounted for, ready to go from zero to "gay agenda" in ten seconds flat! Basically, if you've read about them here on G-A-Y, they will be at the "liberty" fest, pissing us off, yet hopefully giving us some good comedic fodder for Monday morning. Because we also have a goal -- to give their their biased rhetoric the scoffing that it deserves.

So if you're in Boston this weekend (where the convention will be held), are near a TV (where the convention will be broadcast), or are on the Internet (where the convention will be webcast), then you may want to check out Liberty Sunday. Or, if you are a gay person, you can just go to a mirror (where your reflection will stare back at you) and say "You're lesser than and deserve to be marginalized," as the effect will be pretty much the same (and far more straightforward).

::sigh:: We miss Scooby Doo.

Read all about the unbelievable bastardization of the term liberty [Official Site for the organized night of gay disrespect]

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