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11/13/2006

Hellfire and damnation-o, Dolly!

by Jeremy Hooper

Picture 1-35In an interview with Gay People's Chronicle, quasi-gay icon Carol Channing shared the following exchange with reporter Kaizaad Kotwal:

KK: You seem to have a very large gay following. Have you ever thought about why?

CC: I don’t think about them. I’m grateful that they seem to like me. They’re terribly loyal to me. But I’m knee-deep in the Bible and you know what it says about that.

KK: Alright.

CC: Oh, dear. Is this for a gay publication? Have I offended you?

KK: Yes. For the Gay People’s Chronicle. Right now, it’s really not my job to be offended or not be offended. I am just asking questions and reporting answers. I read that you have fought for gay rights. Do you think that the things gay people are fighting for are important?

CC: I don’t think about it. If they can’t take care of their own problems, why should I bother. It’s not my problem.

KK: I see.

CC: At one time there were seven men doing me in Las Vegas. I began to wonder if I had a glandular problem. But you know that the Bible says that that’s not the way it’s supposed to be.

Disheartening.

In response, the collective gay community immediately shared the following exchange with their own good feelings for Carol Channing:

GAY COMMUNITY: How could you?? Ugh, just get the hell out! You're no longer welcome here in my head, good feelings for Ms. Channing!

GOOD FEELINGS FOR CAROL CHANNING: Damn, does this mean I have to go live in the brain of a homophobe now? Ugh, it's so narrow and closed in that mind! Thanks a lot, Carol!

So far Carol Channing has issued no formal apology to the gay community. We do, however, hear gay favorite Stockard Channing will today issue the terse statement: "No relation."

You know what the Bible says --Broadway legend Carol Channing shares some startling views about her gay fans [Gay People's Chronicle]

**UPDATE: Channing's publicist claims the reporter took her statements out of context; 'Gay People's Chronicle' says publicist is just trying to protect his client

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