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08/08/2007

To avoid: Phelps spinning at WeHo's Club Nutty

by Jeremy Hooper

Are you a WeHo queen looking for a little weekend excitement? Bored with the same ol' bars and the same ol' clubs with the same ol' music? In the mood for something a little different? Well fear not, intrepid Hollywood thrill-seeker, for Fred Phelps and his sketchy clan at Westboro Baptist have devised a new weekend option that's guaranteed to....force you to question the nature of humanity:

Picture 23-7

Shocking us that God would now be looking at WeHo in such a negative manner, as we used to see Him all the time living it up at the Abbey. He would always be standing around sipping on a glass of the blood of His son, acting like he owned the whole frickin' world! Frankly, we always found Him to be far too full of himself and downright unapproachable. Oh, and he had a mouth on Him like a sailor, too! Everything was always "Me-damn this!" and "me-damn that!" So yea, He was a little distant and vengeful at times, but we never thought we would someday turn around and curse the place! Bitter much, God?

Or maybe he's just moved on to the Castro or Chelsea, where he can act like He's His gift to everyone in those gay meccas. If anyone sees Him out and about, let us know. He'll be the one that when you say, "Damn, this rain sucks," will respond, "You best be pipin' down or I'll turn that sh*t into a flood!" before demanding that Noah the bartender grab the Grey Goose bottles two by two for safe keeping before he sets sail on Captain Morgan's ark.

***NOTE: This full Westboro press release can be found on their website. However, a link from us is something those kids never receive.

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Your thoughts

In the middle of WeHo? Wow, I seriously worry about the outcome of such an act. Better have a big police presence Fred.

Posted by: Franc | Aug 8, 2007 9:21:31 PM

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