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03/14/2008

Kern's lil' kernel has his say

by Jeremy Hooper

Yesterday we expressed discomfort with the speculation and digging that was going on in regards to Sally Kern's alleged gay child. Today, our hesitancy has been both validated and rendered moot, as the child in question, son Jesse Kern, has now voluntarily come out of the closet of privacy to say that he is actually "straight and not gay." He is, however, celibate. See Tulsa World for more:

Sally Kern's son denies reports he is gay [Tulsa World]

Now that that's out of the way, let the gossip begin about her allegedly gay dog, who rumor has it was seen humping a male pit bull in back alley last Thursday

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Your thoughts

Jeremy, I agree with your decision to not print the story.

I have to say though, Kern’s son’s response was really strange though. Regardless of his sexual orientation I can't imagine that he hasn't been damaged by his hateful homophobic mother’s twisted world view.

My mother was very much like Sally Kern. By the time I reached adulthood she had instilled unbelievable levels of shame, self-hate and distress in me but yet I still loved her deeply and told everyone how much I thanked God for her and the wonderful home that she and my father provided for me knowing full well that the home environment that they provided kept this gay child in perpetual fear and despair. I guess it's a form of Stockholm syndrome to NEED to feel that one’s parents were wonderful even when they weren’t. I think it is particularly so with children brought up in a very religious home.

One day, like a road to Damascus experience, I woke up, opened my eyes to reality and went into a rage. I finally confronted my parents for the HELL that they had put me through and for coming close to completely destroying me and my spirit and for finally throwing me out of the house and shunning me when I could no longer hide my truth.

They were of course defensive and tried to act as if I was an ungrateful child. THEY actually tried to play the victim but I was having NONE of it.

It took years but a couple of years ago they had the same epiphany that I had. They called me back home to Mississippi and confessed to what they had done to me and begged for my forgiveness. I told them that I had already forgiven them a couple of years earlier (once I got over my rage) but I officially forgave them then and there, face to face.

At that moment EVERYTHING changed! Our relationship since has never been better. My mother, now in her 70's, is one of the coolest chicks I know and I tell her so all the time. My father and I have never been closer. We talk about EVERYTHING. He is one of my very best friends.

Having been through all this, something rings familiar to me with this situation in Oklahoma. Whatever the truth is I hope that, in the end, all concerned come to a place of peace, love and understanding and I hope that Sally Kern finds enlightenment through, OR IN SPITE OF, her version of the Christian faith.

If my parents can, ANYONE can.

Sorry for the overly long comment.

Posted by: Zeke | Mar 15, 2008 12:23:35 AM

Thanks for sharing, Zeke. And yes, Jesse's comments were a little odd.

Posted by: G-A-Y | Mar 15, 2008 7:57:57 AM

Sounds like a Randy Thomas reply to me: "I'm a celibate former homosexual, therefore, I'm heterosexual".

Posted by: Scott | Mar 15, 2008 4:53:39 PM

Zeke, that was a great story. I wish it could work out that well for everyone. Except for one cousin, my family of origin has completely dismissed me. Things have worked out well, because my husband's family has accepted me as part of their family. I just wish there was a way of bringing comfort to the very young men and women who are just now experiencing pain at their family's hands.

Posted by: Mike in the Tndra | Mar 16, 2008 11:38:22 AM

Mike in the Tundra, I'm sorry to hear that you and your family haven't reconciled. Don't give up. Mine took 15+ years. It's good that your husband's family have embraced you. It makes ALL the difference.

The only thing we can do to help and comfort young men and women who are in bad family situations is to be OUT, honest proud and live lives that are respectable and respectful so that these kids can see that the truth that their parents and and anti-gay churches and the Sally Kerns of the world will never tell her.

Growing up in Mississippi, I didn't have this luxury. I think we OWE it to gay kids to make their lives and their coming out experiences better than ours were. After all, when it comes to little gay boys and girls, WE often are better parents to them than their own parents are.

Posted by: Zeke | Mar 16, 2008 10:42:08 PM

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