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08/26/2008

Closing the book vs. earmarking certain pages

by Jeremy Hooper

Here is a great quip that Ted Kennedy made during last night's rousing DNCC speech:

"Barack Obama will close the book on the old politics of race and gender and group against group and straight against gay."

And now, here's a fictional portion of a speech that we think Cindy McCain might give when the Republicans begin their soiree:

"Oh, let me all tell you all about this great book on old politics that was recommended by our friends George and Karl! It's simply divis-i-rific! 

There was a time when John might not of liked it, because it talks about games and tactics that used to make him uncomfortable. But it's weird -- ever since the campaign began, he just can't put the thing down!  He's already ordered a copy for the White House.  Plus George tells us there's a copy that he installed behind "Break in Case of Emergency" glass, just in case things get too peaceful and he needs an easy guidebook for restoring the much more convenient state of divisiveness through reliable campaigns of fear.

So yea, folks -- you simply must check out this book. It may never make any book clubs; but it can certainly be used as a club for beating down any progress that one finds too scary!!"

Kennedy's convention remarks [AP via Google]

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