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Help! I'm addicted to living my truth!

by Jeremy Hooper

200809161305In an attempt to both trivialize and demonize Christian singer Ray Boltz for this decision to come out of the closet, American Family Association personality Matt Friedeman has written the following snarky comments on a One News Now blog:

Boltz' addiction apparently is men. So, God made him that way...why deny himself? Another man's addiction is alcohol (or in Boltz's terms — God made me this way...this is how I will drink); but who among us would say, Good...drink then for His glory! Or how about the addictions to pornography, to child molestation, to crack cocaine, to arson? Good...this is the way I'm going to live...God made me this way...when I get drunk I feel his pleasure?

No. No, of course not, God forbid, and wake up. No.

There is a way out. Compulsive disorders like sexual addiction can be healed through a support group of three to eight people who constitute a healing community and to whom the whole history of abuse and failure can be confessed confidentially. It sometimes takes years of persistent accountability, but the grace of Christ can bring transformation as, in the words of professor Don Joy, "the tank of self-respect, based on significant, unconditionally affirming relationships" makes its impact.

So let's see here: Molesting a kid, uncontrollably wacking it to porn, boozing it up in excess, hitting a crack pipe, burning down a house, having a crippling addition to intercourse, or -- loving someone of the same sex in the way that others love someone of the opposite sex?! These are all birds of the same feather that deserve similar form of address? Wow, we don't know who should be more offended by that: Gay people who know it's far more apt to compare their orientations to their heterosexual peers, or credible counselors and therapists whose authentic work is far too important to be hampered by biased fallacy!

But hey, why choose? There's enough offense in the "pro-family" community's self-created, self-propagated, highly unscientific views to offend multiple groups of people.

Ray Boltz and his sexually confused generation [ONN]

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Your thoughts


From what I can tell, Boltz just finally admitted his orientation. I see no indication that he was having (or is having, for that matter) sex with men.

So how can this be an addiction? What exactly would group accountability accomplish if he already has no behaviors to overcome?

Geesh, such idiots. Or, more likely, such vicious unrepentant liars.

Posted by: Timothy | Sep 16, 2008 2:07:21 PM

This is truly huge. His songs "Thank you" and "Watch the Lamb" are staples (or should I write "were") in the Contemporary Christian Music radio world.

I actually can't believe it. But I am thrilled.

Good for him. Perhaps his courage will give others in his industry the boldness to come out. Lord knows its chock full of 'em

Posted by: Jon-Marc | Sep 16, 2008 3:12:00 PM

I didn't know what "sexual addiction" actually entailed, so I looked it up. If you answer yes to any of the following questions then, you MAY have an addiction to sex. I actually think it is a overly simplistic test, and uses highly ambiguous terms like "regularly" and "abnormal" (is it abnormal to do it doggy-style in a hammock? The difficulty factor goes waaaaay up, and you can qualify for style-points, but it's still just sex).

Anyway, I think that Porno Pete, along with most of the anti-gays, could learn a lot about themselves by taking this test:

* Do you regularly purchase sexually explicit magazines?
* Are you preoccupied with sex?
* Do you feel that your sexual behavior is abnormal?
* Does your spouse ever complain about your sexual behavior?
* Do you often feel bad about your sexual behavior?
* Do you hide aspects of your sexual behavior from our partner?
* Has your sexual behavior ever interfered with your family life?
* Have you been unable to stop your sexual behavior even though you know it’s inappropriate?


Posted by: Dick Mills | Sep 16, 2008 3:30:54 PM

Without giving name to unsubstantiated rumor, I've heard that the most influential singer/songwriter of gospel/contemporary Christian music from the 70's is gay.

Posted by: Timothy | Sep 16, 2008 3:32:44 PM

"Compulsive disorders like sexual addiction"

Boltz came out of the closet - he didn't say anything about sexual addiction.

And don't you love how this kook throws in "child molestation", with other so-called "addictions"? There's a huge difference between fucking a kid up sexually, physically and emotionally for life, and ruining your own life with chemicals or drink.

It doesn't surprise me though, with their comparisons - these "christian" nuts would rape a kid, and then walk away as if they just had one too many drinks. Absolutely no shame.

Posted by: Scott | Sep 16, 2008 4:11:20 PM

Good point, Scott. The guy doesn't see the obvious difference between self-destruction (alchohol/drug addiction) and something that harms others (child abuse).
I wasn't too familiar with Ray's music, so I did a search on YouTube for some of his videos, and picked one for what I assume is an older song (since he's sporting a mullet). I didn't know the song and had never seen the video, but I picked it just on instinct out of the dozens that were available. It's for the song "Heaven Is Counting On You". I may be imagining this but...there's something well, gayish about it:

Posted by: Bill S | Sep 16, 2008 6:06:37 PM

Scott and Bill, the thing that I think you guys miss is not that bigots like Friedeman can't see the difference between all of the "addictions" or "wickedness" that they claim to despises, because they do. And they purposefully conflate our relatively benign consensual adult activity with something that everyone, ourselves included, finds to be morally reprehensible.

They falsely and intentionally insinuate that homosexuals are as despicable as child molesters. They know exactly what they're doing, and do it on purpose.

Posted by: Dick Mills | Sep 16, 2008 9:11:46 PM

I don't doubt that some people do it on purpose-I just think there are also plenty of them who are actually stupid enough and bigoted enough to see no difference between homosexuality and the genuinely horrible things they equate with it.

Posted by: Bill S | Sep 17, 2008 6:29:50 AM

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