Good As You: Westboro Roundup

05/02/2006

When picking a team becomes hard: ACLU challenges Westboro-targeting law

The free speech & gay rights defenders at the ACLU have filed a federal lawsuit challenging a recently signed Kentucky law that prevents protests at memorial services, wakes, and burials. But while the law was obviously designed to thwart Westboro...

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04/20/2006

Misspelling is America's terror

A screen cap from a recent "Hannity & Colmes" episode that featured an appearance by Westboro Baptist's Shirley Phelps-Roper: Eeeek -- isn't shoddy captioning the first sign of the Apocalypse? ::sigh:: Maybe we really are doomed.

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04/19/2006

Viral video site infected with mutant strain

Always ones to jump on a new trend, the "fag-hating" folks at Westboro Baptist have now posted a series of videos with titles like "Your Pastor is A Whore," "USA = Fag Nation," and "Fag Pimp Bush" to that popular...

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04/14/2006

Stood up on prom night: Westboro a no-show at Tracy's bash

Despite announced plans of protest, the folks from Westboro Baptist did not show up at Tracy, California's first-ever gay and lesbian prom last night. Which, of course, can only mean one thing -- they viciously dumped Tracy for another event...

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04/13/2006

Prom of Tracy & Tracey to be held in Tracy

Tonight in Tracy, California, hundreds of local LGBT students will gather at Anthony's Steak House for a gay prom, an event the "fag-hating" protesters from Westboro Baptist are expected to picket. Which of course means that through Westboro's famous signs,...

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03/13/2006

No, we're not kidding: WBC wishes for more dead soldiers

In a "news release" regarding 4 American soldiers who were killed this weekend in Iraq, the "fag hating" folks at Westboro Baptist Church say today: Relatedly, in a "sphincter release" responding to the idea that some folks could genuinely hope...

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03/09/2006

Westboro unwilling to allow 'mo protestations to land 'em in the pokey

In response to various legislatures' attempts to ban their protests at soldiers' funerals, the "fag hating" folks from Westboro Baptist say they will abide by the state-level laws enacted to curb their favorite past time, and will instead wait to...

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02/27/2006

She may think our soul to be hellbound, but our comedy she finds top notch

This is an email that was just sent to us by Westboro Baptist's Shirley Phelps-Roper: Every now and again someone among my loved ones will forward something new that you have posted about us. I believe you first landed on...

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02/21/2006

Be it 'Brokeback' or 'Brownback,' Westboro's on the case

From the "fag-hating" folks at Westboro Baptist: Oh yes, that oh-so liberal "fag enablier" Sam Brownback. What next, protesting the prez for "facilitating a culture that knows how to pronounce the word 'nuclear'?" Look out Santorum and Coburn -- we're...

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01/19/2006

If you can picket here, you can picket anywhere

This comes from those "fag-hating" folks at Westboro Baptist Church: And she will of course cohabit in NYC with her good friends "Promiscuous Dutchess Sizable Hooters," "Whorish Queen Tiny Bosom," and "Loose Lady 'Oh, Those Are Fake.'" Attached at the...

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01/16/2006

'The People vs. Very Bent'

The "fag-hating" roustabouts at Westboro Baptist have sent a message to the state legislatures of Indiana, Oklahoma, Nebraska, Missouri, Wisconsin, and Illinois, saying that by attempting to pass laws banning the church from picketing at soldiers' funerals, they are are...

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01/13/2006

Westboro to picket gay prom; attendees to pick it, gay prom dress

High school students from Tracy, California have announced that they will hold an alternative, "gay prom" on April 13. Relatedly, but not unexpectedly, the "fag-hating" folks from Westboro Baptist have announced that they will picket the soiree on that forthcoming...

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01/10/2006

WBC warns black America about pink America

From the "fag-hating" folks at Westboro Baptist: Though in our doctor (the queen)'s dreams -- 'fags' a'plenty! No word if black America, gay America, or the totality of not-batsh*t-insane America should be the most offended by Westboro's warning, though those...

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01/05/2006

Westboro continues to thank God for mine tragedy; God continues to screen His calls

Following up on their initial mine tragedy-based deity thanking, the "fag-hating" folks at Westboro Baptist have today released a new missive expressing gratitude to "the man upstairs" for the tragic deaths of the twelve West Virginia miners. Announcing that they...

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01/04/2006

Westboro thanks God for mine tragedy; neglect to thank Him for 'tragedy, theirs'

From Westboro Baptist: We attempted to reach God to get his two Almighty cents regarding Westboro's gratitude, though unfortunately he's too busy not being an evil bastard to even dignify Wesboro's attempts to defame His character. We'll try to contact...

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12/28/2005

Westboro cheers for dead soldiers, while we jeer their lack of proofreading

In a recap of one of their recent protests, the "fag-hating" folks at Westboro Baptist reminisce about a pro-IED (Improvised Explosive Device) cheer that they joyously chanted: And we think we speak for everyone when we say: UN-F***ING-BELIEVABLE. "What does...

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12/21/2005

'Tis the season for 'fag-hating'

Tired of the same old Christmas tunes? Think "Rudolph" and the "Little Drummer Boy" are totally played out? Well don't fret my new holiday song-desiring friends, as the "fag-haters" at Westboro Baptist Church have filled this musical void by rewriting...

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12/19/2005

MTV to direct cameras towards Westboro?

Rumor has it that MTV crews may be filming a Florida-area protest being held today by the fag-haters at Westboro Baptist Church. Meaning, of course, that Bunim/Murray Productions must have TOTALLY run out of ideas for their venerable reality franchise:...

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12/12/2005

Now in season 15, is America's first family of fag-hating losing some edge?

Is it just us, or are the picketing antics of Westboro Baptist starting to get stale? It's like, "Ooh, you have an upside down flag and you're using children to convey ridiculous messages of hate at the funerals of soldiers....

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12/08/2005

Poo-based coffee: An epic tale of fun, faggotry, and feces

Regarding their picketing of the Supreme Court this Tuesday, the "fag"-hating folks at Westboro Baptist have written a recollection of the day, which they've titled: So you're probably thinking, "hmm, what the Hell is a Feca-cino? It sounds like it...

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12/05/2005

Some ask Santa for toy soldiers, while others request the death of their human counterparts; tomato, tomahto

We're not sure if the military, good Christians, or God should be most offended by Westboro's request, though we're thinking there's enough ugliness here for all three groups to feel affronted. If you're feeling left out, however, just stay tuned,...

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11/28/2005

Westboro and batsh*t crazy celebrate 50 years of commitment

Yesterday marked the 50th anniversary of that ol' fag-hating, sign-carrying, funeral-picketing, society-condemning band of intolerant gypsies known as the Westboro Baptist Church. Relatedly, we received word that a Georgia man shat into a tin can on November 27, 1955, promptly...

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11/17/2005

BREAKING: God speaks via Westboro press release

So God apparently spoke overnight, choosing to do so via the "fag-hating" folks at Westboro Baptist Church. In response to their conversation with the Lord Almighty, the family Phelps issued the following press release this AM: Can you believe their...

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11/14/2005

Show Me State lawmakers move to silence Show Me Hate protesters

Following in the footsteps of Indiana state Sen. Brent Steele, Missouri state Sen. Charlie Shields (R) and state Rep. Martin Rucker (D) proposed a law on Friday that would make funeral protests, popularized by the hate artisans at Westboro Baptist,...

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11/08/2005

Westboro thanks God for IN twister; Mother Nature all like, 'What the..? Where's my thanks? Well, not that you should thank anyone for this, but if you must give insane credit, I think I deserve a bit. It's because I'm a woman, isn't it?'

Well, you know what they say: Every time a Phelps issues a "News Release," an angel gets sick and precedes to vomit over Westboro's fervent embrace of such malevolence, before returning to their computer with an empty stomach to try...

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11/02/2005

Westboro praises the bloodshed of 'the October War'

Gee, we could have sworn the months of Afghanistan or North Korea were bloodier. If only we would pull our troops out of October, Westboro would be forced to return to celebrating the deaths of gays right here in the...

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10/31/2005

Westboro asks God for more dead soldiers; God speechless

Upon reading this, we tried to "Instant Message" God for a response... ...but out of respect for his away message, we refrained from bothering the deity. However, based upon all that we've learned about the Lord Almighty over the years,...

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10/26/2005

America's F***kedupedest Homo-hating Videos

Hey, who wants to see Fred Phelps express his wish that more people had been killed in the London subway bombings? How about Shirley Phelps-Roper justifying the family's proclivity for flying American flags upside down and dragging them on the...

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10/25/2005

God Hates Proposed Legislation

Indiana state senator Brent Steele has proposed a new bill that would ban the unhinged, 'God Hates Fags'-declaring, Phelps clan of Westboro Baptist from protesting at soldier's funerals. Under Steele's proposition, disorderly conduct committed during military funerals would be made...

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10/24/2005

God Hates Misspelled Names

Could this be more disgusting? I mean, who in their right mind could possibly have the audacity to misspell Salman Rushdie? Ugh, simply revolting, Westboro!

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10/17/2005

Folks who tell us we're going to Hell are themselves going to Helena

Due to their constant mentions of "Improvised Explosive Devices" (which they say are being used to killed American soldiers in Iraq as retribution for a 1995 attack made on their Kansas compound), the fag-hating Phelps clan of Westboro Baptist are...

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08/31/2005

Westboro Baptist readying WWWhatthef**k trio

The "fag-hating" Phelps clan of Westboro Baptist are up to their domain name tarnishing antics yet again, this time with the planned sites AmericaIsDoomed.Com, YourPastorIsAWhore.com, and GodIsTheTerrorist.com. Though the sites have yet to launch, the wacky crew have adorned the...

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08/29/2005

'Fag haters' met with resistance in TN; 'queer lovers' delighted to have day off

According to the AP, when the fag-hating, predominately Phelps-monikered clan from Westboro Baptist moseyed on down to Tennessee for a relaxing weekend of picketing soldier funerals, some of the local counterdemonstrators "chased the church members cars' down a highway, waving...

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08/24/2005

Phelps attacks Swedish King and kids; Swedish meatballs spared for now

It is being reported that Sweden's King Carl Gustaf has consulted lawyers regarding comments that Fred Phelps and his kin made on their 'God Hates Sweden' website, on which the "fag haters" claim, in part, that the King "looks like...

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08/17/2005

Every time a Phelps replies to our reply, our inbox laughs uncontrollably

In response to our response to their response to today's entry on Westboro Baptist's new ventures (keepin' up?), WBC member Tim Phelps wrote us with this declaration: Clearly there is only one suitable reply: Is "feces eating" a hyphenate? And...

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Every time a Phelps replies, an English teacher weeps

Responding to today's entry on Westboro Baptist's new ventures, WBC members Tim and Lee Ann Phelps wrote us with this chunk o' brilliance: If T & L (we're close like that) would have looked through 'are' handy Westboro archives, they...

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Fall Preview: From the misshapen mind of Westboro Baptist comes this wacky new spinoff

Tired of having your gag reflexed triggered by GodHatesFags.com? Bored with the antics of GodHatesAmerica.com? Find GodhatesCanada.com or GodHatesSweden.com too regional? Well fear not, fellow folks who can't help but stare at car wrecks, as the kinsmen responsible for those...

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07/22/2005

Phelps clan reportedly blows yet another town's budget

Earlier this week, we told you about the costs the city of Plattsburg, NY incurred when the God Hates Fag rabid dog and witless pony show came to their fair town for a lil' visit. Additionally, we reminded you how...

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07/20/2005

American 'fag-hating' costs continue to mount

Though they'll likely deny responsibility, yet another city is claiming that the folks of Westboro Baptist/God Hates Fags cost them a pretty penny when they came to town to inform the residents that they're all gonna burn in a fiery...

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07/08/2005

Westboro Baptist praises London bombings

Below you will find an excerpt from the latest FUBAR press release being distributed by the folks at Westboro Baptist Church/ God Hates Fags: Which leads us to the one obvious question: Isn't it supposed to be "Wish it WERE...

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07/07/2005

Westboro Baptist gets all artsy fartsy

Bored with the same ol' "hey look at me, I've got a bigoted sign" photos that have been par for their kooky course over the past few years, the folks at Westboro Baptist/God Hates Fags have gone a more artistic...

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07/05/2005

Some watch fireworks, others condemn folks to hell; tomato, tom-ah-to

This weekend, while you might have been devouring hot dogs and enjoying some freedom, the folks from Westboro Baptist/God Hates Fags continued on their insatiable quest to condemn every man, woman, and toaster to an eternity spent in the fiery...

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06/27/2005

Cost of 'hating fags' has gotten SO out of hand

Well it's only a fraction of the $10,000 they reportedly cost the city of Tracy, California, but the Westboro Baptist Church's recent protest in Dracut, Massachusetts is said to have cost that city an estimated $2,200 due to the needed...

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06/15/2005

One more from Margie

After her last charming email, we responded to Ms. Margie with this: Isn't it true that if you guys hadn't been there to protest, then there would have been no reason for anyone to counter your attempts? Therefore, the necessity...

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You know you've arrived when 'God Hates Fags' acknowledges your existence

In response to our piece on the the God Hates Fags crew costing the city of Tracy, California upwards of $10,000, princess of fag-hating Margie Phelps had this to say: From: Margie Phelps Subject: Your whining about the cost of...

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06/14/2005

Fag-hating not only reprehensible, but also pricey

According to local police, weekend anti-gay protests held by our ol' two-step partners at God Hates Fags, cost the city of Tracy, CA around $10,000 in the form of salary and benefits for the necessary on-hand officers. This five-digit bill...

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06/13/2005

Extreme Makeover: 'God Hates Fags' Edition

Subject: Shirly Phelps-Roper, as spotted this weekend in San Francisco Problem: Ms. P-R's wholesome charm and lovely bone structure are getting lost behind some insanely crazy signs Our advice to the grand doyenne of fag hating: Within days people will...

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06/06/2005

Degeneres essay leads to anti-gay protest, possible farmer's tan

The good ol' Westboro Baptist/God Hates Fags gang protested outside of a Boston-area elementary school today, in reaction to an essay one of the school's fifth-grade students wrote on openly gay talk show host Ellen Degeneres. After leaving the school,...

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05/31/2005

Westboro Baptist's Memorial Day 'message to America' (BBQ tips not included)

God Hates Fags/ Westboro Baptist's Memorial Day message to America, as found on their charming little web site: "You have sinned away your day of grace. It is no longer possible for you to repent. God has given you up...

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05/26/2005

"God Hates Fags" starting to get hair down there

On May 30, the nationwide "God Hates Fags" pickets will turn 14 years old, a b-day that the Westboro Baptist folks will be celebrating at Topeka's Gage Park. For its special day, we hear that the adolescent God Hates Fags...

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