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09/19/2005

Gay penguins head to Divorce Court

by Jeremy Hooper

   Following in the footsteps of Brad and Jen, Renee Zelwegger and Kenny Chesney, and Tori Spelling and Tori Spelling's husband, the gay penguins of Central Park have reportedly become the latest celebrity couple headed towards Splitsville.

After six blissful years, the homo duo (Silo and Roy) have reportedly stopped spending time together, with Silo having the nerve to turn his affections to a new FEMALE hussy named Scrappy. While Silo explores this newfound hetero love with the nest wrecker, poor Roy is said to be in a lonely funk, pining for happier days of yore. Damn you, Scrappy!!

We hear that Roy is seeking half of the adulterous Silo's daily fish and squid earnings, total ownership of the couple's summer place in the Bronx Zoo, and full custody of the tourists.

Gay Penguins Break Up [Fox News]

**UPDATE: Knight weighs in on queer penguins' trial separation [G-A-Y]

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