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Alaska Supremes effectively piss off Governor

by Jeremy Hooper

Overturning a lower court ruling, the Alaska Supreme Court ruled Friday that it is unconstitutional to deny benefits to the same-sex partners of the state's public employees:

Alaska high court favors benefits for gay partners [AP via USA Today]

   Responding to the Supremes' decision, Republican Governor Frank Murkowski says, “I'm absolutely outraged by this shameful court ruling."

   Responding to Governor Murkowski's supremely offensive statement, we ask, "Are you trying to look like a dick, a douche, or a dicky douche? Or wait, is it douchey dick? Hmm, we always get that one confused. Whatever, we're just splitting hairs now; basically we just want to know, Governor - why are you being such a taint stain about this?"

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