Key to a happy gay: When anti-gays compare you to cancer, compare them to a Muppet

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11/09/2005

by Jeremy Hooper

Ake Green (pic.), a Swedish pastor who in 2003 referred to gays as a "cancerous tumor on all of society," continued his sentiment o' offense in the nation's highest court on Wednesday, saying that his musings on the carcinogenic nature of queers were meant to warn gays that their queerlike ways will ultimately lead to an "eternal divorce" from God.

Not even a trial separation, mind you, but rather a full-on divorce!

Relatedly, The Swedish Chef (pic.), who from 1976-1981 delighted gays as a character on "The Muppet Show," continued his aggressive yet strange pronunciation on Wednesday, saying that his exclamation of "vatch yuoor hunds, meester" was meant to warn the arm up his arse that its grabby ways will ultimately lead to a "boott keecking" from Animal, Kermit, and himself.