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Wisconsin marriage hearing, you had us at "I pledge alleg..."

by Jeremy Hooper

   According to the AP, Wisconsin gay marriage supporters attending a hearing on the issue today at the state Capitol, concluded their pre-testimony recitation of the Pledge of Allegiance by pointedly shouting the last two words in the line, "liberty and justice FOR ALL."

Oh, but the Pledge fun didn't stop there -- there was also notoriously cranky lesbian Bitchy McWhiner, whose late arrival to the Capitol building and resulting deprivation of booty rest made "for which IT STANDS" the line with which she chose to make her less than subtle point.

Not to mention Wisconsin's ultra liberal activist Feisty Lefton, whose refusal to even utter part of the word "Republican" forced her to noticeably change the line "to the Republic" to "to the Democr."

And who can forget brilliant scientist Makeur OwnSciencePuns, whose firm grasp on the true ferocity of natural disasters led him to follow up the word "indivisible" with a long-winded explanation of how a super-powerful earthquake could possibly divide the U.S., in theory.

Of course none of the last three actually happened, but if we have to discuss one more state-level "you queers are gonna destroy society/ no we're not/ yes you are/ you're mean/ you're immoral"-style debate in a traditional way, we're likely to start breaking things. So please, my pets, just indulge our "Pledge" nonsense, for our sanities are at stake. If you would, however, like to see how this particular marriage hearing differed from the countless others of yore, some humorless takes below:

Hundreds jam gay marriage hearing at Wisconsin Capitol [AP via GazetteExtra.com]
Ban called 'attack on dignity' as marriage debate fills Capitol [The Capital Times]

***For fantastic updates on the Badger State's fight, please check out Action Wisconsin's No on the Amendment blog

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