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01/31/2006
GSAs targeted by another state lawmaker; math clubs okay for now
In the Virginia legislature, who you may remember from such recent lawmaking actions as approving a gay marriage ban, Del. Matthew Lohr (pic.) is currently pushing a bill through the House that would allow local school boards to "prohibit school facilities from being used by any student club or other student group that encourages or promotes sexual activity by unmarried minor students."
Now, on the surface that may sound a little silly but ultimately well-intentioned. This is, of course, until you realize that by most every account, the main impetus of the bill is to dissolve gay-straight alliances throughout the state. Because as everyone knows, queer high school students have absolutely nothing more to discuss than hardcore schtuppin'. Their lives are just so easy and carefree, they couldn't possibly need a group to help them with their problems, assure them that they're not alone, or let them know that there are others who give a damn. Sex, sex, and more sex must be the only topic on the clubs' itineraries, as in this political climate, what else could they possibly have to discuss?
::writer rolls eyes, shakes head, and emits an exasperated sigh::
Lohr's bill won preliminary House approval Monday, will get a final vote today, and could head to the Senate as early as this week. So look out, Virginia GSAs -- your threatening encouragement of respect and inclusivity has been pinpointed, and your organizational days of debauched hedonism could be numbered. You've had your "discrimination sucks," "I'm just living my life honestly," and "I'm a good person" fun for far too long; it really is time a state law quieted your deviant propagation of acceptance. In fact, you should be thanking Del. Lohr for dedicating his elected energy to this measure. After all, due to his new attempt to cultivate stigmatization for yet another generation, you now have another topic to breakup the monotonous dredge of lascivious ribaldry that we all know fills the better part of your pervy sex-filled meetings.
::writer rolls eyes even more dramatically, shakes head so ferociously that a muscle is almost pulled, and emits an "Ugh" so great, you'd think your scribe had just smelled an elephant fart:
Gay-straight student alliances seen as bill's target [AP via DailyPress.com]
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