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If London Bridge is falling down, don't expect Westboro to catch it

by Jeremy Hooper

WestbritYou may remember that on Monday, we posted some video from a BBC documentary that chronicles the exploits of the Westboro Baptist Church. Well, apparently that documentary special has led loads of Britons to send angry emails to Westboro, which has prompted the Phelps family to respond in their usually genial tone. A sampling:

"...you British Beasts and U.K. Eunuchs have had no claim to salvation or righteousness for many years. You cruelly persecuted the prophets whom God sent you, leading your citizens to flee your tyrannical so-called Acts of Uniformity, Acts of Supremacy, five-mile act, and similar outrageous laws against God. Indeed, at your hand Bright Shining America was founded. That was necessary to have a super power rise up – which was necessary to lead to these Last of the Last Days. That’s the one decent thing you Bubblehead Brits and U.K. Upstarts have done in your entire history. Most of your years you’ve groped around in thick darkness, including in the days when it was said that the sun rose and set on the British Empire.

Now you’re part of a cursed and doomed world and generation. Very shortly Christ is going to come through the clouds, in power and glory, with his holy angels, taking vengeance on them who knew not God and obeyed not the gospel. That would include every one of you British Bastards and U.K. Insurgents.

So don’t waste your time lobbing your half-baked hate missives at us. We’ve dealt with the violent, vicious, bloody, vindictive, God-cursed Doomed americans on their mean streets for over 15 years. You twits in the U.K. are no match, and indeed today you are but a pale shadow of your former selves (when the British Empire covered one-fourth of the earth’s surface), because God has not blessed you in a long time. You are simply a raunchy little group of pagans, no larger than Oregon, who long ago quit pretending to believe in God, and who have given yourselves over fully to lust and sin. The only good news we can offer you is that you are not in as much trouble with God today – maybe – as Doomed america, and her false lying whore prophets and her “leaders.” But you have access to the Bible just like us, and you are responsible to know it and follow it. It would be well, therefore, for you to get a Bible, read it, AND OBEY.

Geez. And we were worried that we were being "ugly Americans" for thinking British food leaves a little something to be desired. Cursing the whole nation -- that's WAY worse.

****Note: This full Westboro missive can be found on their website. However, a link from us is something those kids never receive.

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Your thoughts

Man, why they gotta drag Oregon into it? Now I REALLY hate them! Not to mention that they did their math way wrong...

Posted by: suomichris | Apr 4, 2007 2:40:12 PM

The Alliteration Cops are going to get them! If they don't , the Phelpses are going to start on "P" for "poufs" - uh, "P - H --ELPS" - scratch that.

Posted by: NancyP | Apr 4, 2007 7:41:35 PM

lol! I couldn't stop laughing at this! Thanks, btw, for helping me see the funny side of their whole organisation in the first place...

Honestly, I would have thought they'd think England *worse* than the US... After all, isn't their standard one of God-bothering? Quite out of fashion in the UK, or so I hear... The UK has it's civil unions bill, which most people are quite happy to call marriage - and it has one of the lowest Sunday church attendance rates in the world.

Got to love Britain for that fact alone lol...

Posted by: Anon | Apr 4, 2007 7:46:48 PM

Fred Phelps and the rest of his Westboro cult are completely corrupt and they are operating against the bible.

God commands us to love God and love one another. God is love.

John 3:16 For God Loved the World that he gave his only begotten son Jesus and for those who believe in Jesus shall not parish but shall live forever.

John 13:34 I give you a new commandment: love one another. As I have loved you, so you also should love one another.

These are examples of bible verses that the Westboro Cult are not obeying. They are filled with hate.

God loves the sinner but hates the sin. I believe for those who accept Jesus Christ as their Savior and repent of their sins shall be saved.

Posted by: Bashful | Apr 9, 2007 3:29:13 AM

I saw the documentary as a repeat the other night and wondered how long it would be before the cult of Phelps had a go at the UK. I'm not religious but I do know parts of the Bible and to say WBC are being "selective" in their use of quotes from it would be an understatement. And their "love-hate" relationship with Saddam Hussein just shows them up as total hypocrites.

The funniest thing is the fact that they picket the funerals of fallen soldiers and seem to hate the very land which protects their freedom of speech. If they tried that here in the UK, the whole inbred mob of morons would have been banged up long ago for inciting racial or religious hatred - if they hadn't had 7 shades of shit knocked out of them first

Posted by: Callum | Apr 28, 2007 9:40:33 AM

It's interesting that Fred Phelps claims to know the Bible more than anyone else on the planet, yet even I, who has never read the Bible, can clearly see that he is a hypocrit for several reasons. The Bible says to let God alone judge people, not us. He will judge in heaven, until then we are to love everyone equally. Everyone in the westboro cult seems to judge people without knowing ANYTHING about them. Also, it is actually rather stupid to believe that God hates a specific country. When you die, I highly doubt God will look at you and be like "you are American, therefore you go to hell, cause I hate Americans". I believe he looks at every person individually. I do not believe the younger members of the cult mean to do evil, they were clearly brainwashed at a young age. I hope they can break away like some of their brothers and sisters have.

Posted by: David | Aug 30, 2007 11:58:52 PM

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