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Dobson finds his Mr. Right

by Jeremy Hooper

 Good As You Images Dobneg-1-1-1A few days after he announced that he's unlikely to vote for anyone should John McCain obtain the GOP nomination, Focus of the Family's head family focuser, James Dobson, has announced that he is endorsing his brother in anti-gayness, Mike Huckabee:

Dr. Dobson Endorses Gov. Huckabee [FOF]

Dobson specifically cites Huckabee's own opposition to gay marriage as a reason why he's throwing his support to the former Arkansas governor. Which makes total sense, considering that forty years from now, when marriage amendments are widely recognized as disgustingly misguided historical injustices, folks like Dobson are going to need a larger political figure to take some of the blame off of their own legacies. They already have one president who will absorb much of the outrage. If they get another in '08 -- well, then it'll be far easier for their heirs to tuck their ancestors' inhumane actions behind a discriminatory Figurehead-in-Chief.

So yea -- we get it, Jimmy. If the writing on the wall so clearly told us that our own life's work was on the track towards "civil rights abomination" status, we'd be looking for fall guys too!

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Your thoughts

So, sometime midweek next week Dobson (Dobby) will get on his radio show and the chat with John Fuller (JF), program host, will go so something like this. Tom Minnery (Minnie), one of the five-hundred thousand vice-presidents they have at Focus, will be in the studio as well. Here's the transcript:

JF (also a VP of something or another at Focus): As you know, last week Dr. Dobson made an endorsement for president of the United States. Well shortly after that announcement the liberal media, as usual, twisted his words and said he endorsed a candidate for president of the United States.

Doctor, we have seen this all before. The mainstream media is out to get you. Saying you endorsed someone for president! I mean, we know they hate you but these lies are amazing. How do you stay above it all?

Dobby: Well, John, as you know I have never sought a place at the table of power. Never! I am just concerned for all the little boys and girls in the United States and god has blessed that and this ministry. And now the liberal media is at it again because they hate that God has blessed us. Saying I endorsed. Lies, lies! They hate me because I am righteous. They hate us because we are holy. The New York Times went as far to say that I would not vote for John McCain. Of course, I expect that from them. I mean there are a lot of Jews…er, I mean homosexuals that work at the Times.

Minnie: But Doctor, they have really been brutal this time. And you know when the New York times goes after you you are doing something right! (Laughter erupts). But you are such a man of God, such a family man, such an eloquent speaker, such a beautiful person, such a gem and a gent. You have shiny teeth and pretty suits and lovely skin tone. I ffwfsf (Inaudible as Minnie returns his lips firmly back on Dobby’s ass)

JF: Well that’s all for now. And remember folks if you want the truth, please tune in here or give us a call. But never, under any circumstances, listen to the liberal media!

Next on our broadcast, Shirley Dobson will be in the studio and no doubt she will cry. Big crying and the state of our sorry nation will be the topic she covers as her voice quivers because she is just so gosh-darned sad that this nation sucks. Be sure to tune in because as you know, Shirley only cries every four years, right around election time.

Posted by: Jon-Marc | Feb 8, 2008 10:04:16 AM

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