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by Jeremy Hooper

SHIRLEY: Good evening and welcome to WBC News. Fred's off tonight, nursing a wicked case of self-imposed moral superiority. I'm Shirley.

Our top story tonight...

SHIRLEY: And now here's Margie with all your "hating gays and liberals as sport" headlines.

MARGIE: Thanks, Shirl. We'll have your Morality Monopoly scores in just a bit. But first this...

MARGIE: Oh, looks like I'm all out of time and can't give you those scores. Well, all you need to know is that if you were not birthed of someone in my family, then you automatically lose. Shirl, back to you.

SHIRLEY: Thank you, Margie. That's your WBC News for tonight. Hopefully you'll join us tomorrow morning when God will have your forecast, Jael will show you the latest spring protest fashions direct from Milan, and Fred Jr. will give you tips on how to feed a gay-loathing family of 7,000 in this economy. But for now, good night.

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Your thoughts

Bloody Beast would be a great name for a rock band!

I wonder if Margie shaves her legs?

I think it would be funny to send Shirley a coupon for a free Brazilian Wax!

Am I the only one who wonders when the last time either of them got laid was?

Maybe they are secretly incestuous lovers??

My mind wonders all over the place when I listen to them!

Where's Phred? Haven't seen that old coot for a while.

I really like the Obama with the Ram's Horns! I want that as a tattoo on my ass cheek!

These kooks just prove the moral depravity of the fundies, and I still think that 24/7 commercials highlighting theses phreakies would be the best way for us to win over the movable middle... NEXT TIME!

Posted by: Dick Mills | Apr 10, 2009 9:23:27 PM

Have you heard that God hates toast, too?


Posted by: Brooke | Apr 10, 2009 11:26:12 PM

These videos are SO awesomely hilarious!

Posted by: John | Apr 11, 2009 12:41:17 AM

If these women weren't so afraid of the gay, they might get themselves to a beauty salon and do something about that dreadful hair.

Posted by: Blanca DeBree | Apr 11, 2009 12:26:34 PM

Margie looks... strange.

Posted by: anon | Apr 11, 2009 1:37:25 PM

I might be able to listen to what Shirley has to say if she could somehow look less insane.

Posted by: remix | Apr 11, 2009 2:38:01 PM

I still liked the WBC video you altered with Fred Phelps simultaneously talking in the high and low voices. That was a real kicker! LOL!

Posted by: KZ | Apr 11, 2009 5:42:45 PM

Whenever they address us as "doomed earth dwellers" I like to think of them broadcasting from some flying saucer hovering in the ionosphere, kinda like that alien reporter from Futurama.

Also: the Mark includes...some things.

Posted by: Chris D | Apr 12, 2009 4:40:48 PM

Bitch burgers and slut shakes! OMG! This is seriously hilarious. Imagine being born in this family and having this non stop drivel in your ears 24/7.

What is the best about these freaks, most people don't like them. They get in arguments at their protests with just about everyone going by. People know they are loony.

They just crave attention.

Posted by: Flyer | Apr 12, 2009 6:35:23 PM

I bet Fred's too senile to star in these videos anymore.

Posted by: andy | Apr 12, 2009 8:48:16 PM

I wonder what constitutes a "Prophetess?" Bad hair? Auto-bot reporting? Poor color choices?

Good gawd, can you imagine either one of these women as your mother?

Posted by: Jonathan | Apr 14, 2009 3:37:47 PM

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