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07/30/2009
Convenient claims for a CON-niving movement
1. Gays are molested by older people.
A claim that's too offensive to even dignify. Of all the far-right's claims about us, it is perhaps the most unhinged. And while it is meant to demonize LGBT people, it is a claim that also comes with the dangerous side effect of trivializing/overlooking actual cases and causes of molestation.
2. Gays are neglected by or don't feel close to the parent of the same gender.
Obviously this is far from a concrete truth. For many gays, it's the exact opposite. For most, it's somewhere in the middle (as it is with most children in general).
But when there is a degree of truth in this scenario, those who peddle this "cause" of gayness never for a second consider that maybe, just maybe, the distance between a gay person and their same-sex parent has to do with the child's in-born, possibly gender-non-conforming views and interests vary greatly from their heterosexual same-sex parent. And they also never consider the unfortunate instances when the child's gayness leads a certain type of parent to shun their queer child. Instead, they say with certainty that it is the "neglect" itslef that "caused" the 'mosexuality.
3. Gays feel out of place with peers of the same gender.
Like #2, the ones who peddle this "cause" never consider that cases of gay out-of-placiness are due to the child's gender-noncomfority, and many of their peers hesitancy around the same. Obviously our suggestion is the far more plausible one, as it would also explain why LGBT children face demonstrably higher rates of bullying. But since the anti-gay side is desperately looking for "causation," they aggressively push the idea that its the playground behavior that leads to the homosexuality, not the homosexuality that leads to certain playground behavior.
And of course just like with the parent thing, this childhood scenario is not an LGBT universal. We LGBT folk are best friends, sleepover guests, class clowns, homecoming queens, star athletes, nerds, jocks, freaks, geeks, and everything in between.
4. Lady-gays have had bad experiences with men
Yea, the bad experience was being told that they must date men, when their reality tells them otherwise!!!
Seriously: Does anyone out there really believe that in this "war of the sexes" world, having issues with men is the reason why women become gay?! If that were the case, every girl we befriended in college would have punctuated her drunken, "why do guys suck so much?" rants a followup promise to never suck again.
5. The APA's 1973 reclassification of homosexuality was due solely to political pressure
A convenient, oft-recited theory. But let's be real here. The American Psychiatric Association is a body of science. An actual one, unlike the ones the anti-gay side uses. Do you really think that they would just willy-nilly say, "Screw it -- let's declare gays to be normal!" and retain that notion for thirty-six years if that idea were nothing more than propaganda?! OF COURSE NOT!
The truth is that pressure forced the APA to carefully reconsider their outdated homosexuality classification, and the three decades of continue research has only emboldened the decision (while devaluing the "ex-gay" notion). And the continued truth is that since science is the anti-acceptance movement's Achilles Heel, their attacks on science are the ones they must make at any cost.
At least that's what we think. But we, unlike our oppsition, encourage folks to think for themselves. So here, let El Paso, TX, preacher Tom Brown sell you his own talking points so that you can make up your own mind:
Someone's confused decibels for veracity.
Next it gets even more annoying to both gays and lovers of fact when Tom, who apparently hasn't met the vast majority of gays that we know, brazenly intimates that all gays fall into one of his self-determined categories. He also, quite predictably, compares us and our need to "change" to the "Struggle" of alcoholics, adulterers, swindlers, thieves, and everything else he can toss in the kitchen sink of unsavoriness. And of course it's all done under the evangelically arrogant assumption that we are all damaged goods with broken psyches:
Are you convinced? Yes/no?
Well here, let us tell you what we think. We truly believe with all of our might that tapes like this will be studied by future societies, with LGBT people finally receiving the empathy/syympathy that we so richly deserve. And we are determined to make that happen while those who fought so hard for that, society's truly needed change, are still alive to experience it!
Your thoughts
If a bad experience with a man is all it takes for a woman to become a lesbian...
(say it with me, sistahs)
EVERY FRAKKIN' WOMAN IN AMERICA WOULD BE GAY!
Also, if a bad experience with a man can make a woman lesbian, shouldn't a bad experience with a man also turn a gay man into a raging hetero?
Posted by: Bill S | Jul 30, 2009 7:18:23 PM
Time to bring those Youtube ratings down!
Posted by: ---- | Jul 30, 2009 7:19:49 PM
I do fall under the category of gay men who aren't close to their fathers. It never bothered me. Similar personalities and interests on the opposite end of the spectrum do not a close relationship make. Meanwhile, I can think of at least half a dozen relatives off the top of my head who, under this "theory", should be gay but aren't, and I have little doubt that doing a little digging would likely triple that number. Most insultingly, it is completely disrespectful to the complexities of my relationship with my father.
Posted by: RainbowPhoenix | Jul 30, 2009 7:26:27 PM
This wingnut's arguments have no basis in fact, reason or compassion. It always makes me so angry seeing the flocks of sheeple who drink in everything that loudmouths like this guy espouse. Argh! lol
Posted by: Andrew H | Jul 30, 2009 7:29:56 PM
I think that the APA should put Religiosity on the list of mental illnesses. Aggressive ignorance is simply sickness by any measure. I also think that electroshock therapy might be effective on them as well - maybe some research should be done...
I also think that street corner psychoanalysts (like this stuffed shirt) should be arrested for practicing without a license. If he were trying to remove someone's appendix, they would throw his ass in jail. He might know the general location of the appendix, and have a sharp knife, but that doesn't make a surgeon. Yet and still, these self appointed psychologists freely dispense pseudo-horse-hockey-nonsense with impunity.
I don't care if they want to believe that homosexuality is a sin. Or even if they want to shout that nonsensical drivel from every street corner. But when they start rewriting medical texts, and diagnosing "illness", I start to draw the line.
And even though I think that their aggressively ignorant religiosity is a sickness, I would defer to the APA for the final judgment on that before I actually started to diagnose the malady. Just sayin' .. if the unqualified, uneducated and unskilled are diagnosing illness, and it isn't illegal, maybe it should be.
And furthermore, AIDS didn't start in the gay community, and this jackass just told these clapping morons that it did. And, almost all child molesters are heterosexual.
Posted by: Dick Mills | Jul 30, 2009 7:59:34 PM
Pah, that's just rude to assume is what it is. And we all remember what it makes some one whom assumes, yes? Tee hee~
Anyway, in number two, I have the opposite problem: I love my mummy dearest SO much, but poor old daddy, I'm afraid we've been at odds for quite awhile, I'd say. *hanky to wipe away sarcastic tear*
I am of the opinion that these people need to get over themselves, quite frankly. The world is changing too fast for their liking, and there's nothing they can do about it.
I do believe the phrase 'Neener neener' should be appropriate here. Quite so indeed. *sips tea*
Posted by: Clicky the Fox | Jul 30, 2009 9:05:10 PM
From my observation, I can deduce that obesity is caused by wearing enormous trousers.
Posted by: Celia | Jul 30, 2009 11:31:37 PM
I think the APA should add homophobia to the list of mental illnesses. Clearly, many unrepentant homophobes are unable to distinguish reality from fantasy.
Posted by: Michael | Jul 31, 2009 7:05:01 AM
I'm so tired of being insulted by these religious zealots. So, I'd like them to take this questionnaire:
The Heterosexual Questionnaire
1. What do you think caused your heterosexuality?
2. When and where did you decide you were a heterosexual?
3. Is it possible this is just a phase and you will out grow it?
4. Is it possible that your sexual orientation has stemmed from a neurotic fear of others of the same sex?
5. Do your parents know you are straight? Do your friends know- how did they react?
6. If you have never slept with a person of the same sex, is it just possible that all you need is a good gay lover?
7. Why do you insist on flaunting your heterosexuality... can’t you just be who you are and keep it quiet?
8. Why do heterosexuals place so much emphasis on sex?
9. Why do heterosexuals try to recruit others into this lifestyle?
10. A disproportionate majority of child molesters are heterosexual... Do you consider it safe to expose children to heterosexual teachers?
11. Just what do men and women do in bed together? How can they truly know how to please each other, being so anatomically different?
12. With all the societal support marriage receives, the divorce rate is spiraling. Why are there so few stable relationships among heterosexuals?
13. How can you become a whole person if you limit yourself to compulsive, exclusive heterosexuality?
14. Considering the menace of overpopulation how could the human race survive if everyone were heterosexual?
15. Could you trust a heterosexual therapist to be objective? Don't you feel that he or she might be inclined to influence you in the direction of his orher leanings?
16. There seem to very few happy heterosexuals. Techniques have been developed that might enable you to change if you really want to.
17. Have you considered trying aversion therapy?
Posted by: Carrie | Jul 31, 2009 10:53:33 AM
People say that I'm a lesbian because I was never that close to my father, that I have a negative impression of men from him. When I insist that actually, I'm a daddy's girl, they claim I'm a lesbian because I'm comparing every man I meet to my papa.
It's kinda laughable when the anti-gay movement can't even get their lies straight, non? x
Posted by: Chaz x | Jul 31, 2009 3:02:48 PM
Mom's accepting but she's asked about the phase thing before and thinks the "flaunting" thing may turn off gay supporters or more neutral people away from our cause.
I'm afraid I don't know a lot about my daddy, at 20.75 I haven't even spent the .05 with him. Seriously, in almost 21 years I've seen him for maybe...the equivilant of a week? A lot of that stemming from the one single sleepover I've gotten with my two younger half-bros. Well.... there was gonna be another with Alex last year but his friends popped over and I felt like a 3rd wheel, Dad doesn't know about that mwahaa... Or about my being gay. Mom does though.
But me and Mom are close and at odds depending on the day because of her job stress so one day we're laughing and the next day it's like "You smell, go shower" "NAO, FACK YOU" "GET OUT OF MY HOUSE" "-Shits on the floor-" Okay no the last part's a joke but you knowwww~~~
Posted by: Jake | Jul 31, 2009 6:39:48 PM
A very good post; accurate, thoughtful, and well expressed. The anger and frustration you convey are fully warranted, for we are a long way from the time when all law-abiding citizens are accorded the respect and opportunities they deserve. It is a sad fact that a large segment of society still regards gay men and women (among various minorities) as second-class citizens - or worse. That is the salient point of my recently released biographical novel, Broken Saint. It is based on my forty-year friendship with a gay man, and chronicles his internal and external struggles as he battles for acceptance (of himself and by others). More information on the book is available at www.eloquentbooks.com/BrokenSaint.html.
Mark Zamen, author
Posted by: Mark Zamen | Aug 6, 2009 1:46:31 PM
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